All I Need is a Handbasket

“What’re you doing this weekend?”

“I was thinking about going to the movies.”

“What’re you gonna see?”

“I dunno. There’s this new French cartoon that I hear is pretty good. Or I might go see three hours worth of Our Lord and Savior getting the shit kicked out of him.”

“Yeah, I think I’m going to wait for rental on that one.”

“Not me, I’m going. I’m gonna buy popcorn and nachos and do MST-3K through the whole thing.”

“That’s a good idea. I’d like to see that.”

“You want to go with me?”

“No, I don’t want to be ‘with’ you, but I’d like to watch you get lynched.”

“What do you bet happens first, I go to hell or I get lynched?”

“Does it have to be either/or?”

“That’s a fair point.”

“I heard that the guy playing Jesus actually got hurt during filming. Got a big ol’ gash on his back, dislocated his shoulder…”

“…yeah, actors are such fucking prima donnas.”